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It's something they've been talking about for years, but getting things done in Corporate America is very similar to pushing a bill through Congress, I imagine. Anyway, the thing finally arrived, and when I tried to take it into the fat sex building at work, the security guards reacted as if I'd walked in with explosives strapped to my chest. The old guy at the desk had a look of panic on his face when I fat sex showed him what was in the box (gasp!), and told fat sex me in a harsh voice to "just hold it right there, buddy." He said he needed to get the captain(??), and began hollering frantically into a walkie-talkie. A few minutes later a fat bastard with a moustache, as humorless as a robot, showed up and eyed me suspiciously as the husk of a man told him about all the terrible things I had done.
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