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People who’ve never shit at work make up only ten fat girl gone wild percent of the people who responded, while there was a tie for the top response: thirty percent said “Once in a while, I don’t know what the big fat girl gone wild deal is,” and “Only when there’s no alternative.” Hey, whatever. You people keep on crapping on stage like GG Allin, and I’ll continue to do it in the comfort of my home, behind closed doors, and with towels stuffed under the door. I’m mildly shocked at the results of the poll, but I have to admit that my way has its limitations. Years ago, when dinosaurs roamed the earth, I went to Charleston, SC with my girlfriend and her family for a long weekend. We stayed with a friend of their family, in a really nice house on an island off the South Carolina coast. I remember that the place was immaculate, and had wall-to-wall snow white carpeting.
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